Accept The Past, Don't Fear The Future
by MelanieChambers104
Summary: Summary: AU. The NJBC haven't spoken in years but their high school reunion will soon put an end to that. People change, relationships rekindle and the future has never looked so good. "Never settle for what's safe when the risk is always gets your heart racing" C/B with some N/S scenes - Chapter 4 rated M.
1. Chapter 1

The Reunion: Prologue

Summary: AU. Ten years have passed since the Constance & St. Judes days when the biggest issues were what drugs you'd smoke next and what colour headbands you'd wear. The NJBC haven't spoken in years but all that will change after one night - their high school reunion. My thoughts on how people would have turned out. Chair.

Rated T/M - set after 2x01 - back when Gossip Girl was fresh and amazing. Enjoy!

XOXO

_Pick the day. _

_Enjoy it - to the hilt. _

_The day as it comes. _

_People as they come... _

_The past, I think, has helped me appreciate the present - _

_And I don't want to spoil any of it by fretting about the future. _

_-Audrey Hepburn_

He waited patiently, his eyes drifting from the clock on the wall to the carved mahogany door which people seemed to be flooding in from by the dozen. All faces smiling, all people who he had successfully erased from his life, both physically and mentally.

Ten years, yet it felt like it was only yesterday that he had had no worries, no troubles and life itself was just… easy. He could wake up at three in the afternoon, banish his woman of the hour from his sanctuary, get dressed and start the wild, blurry, drug infused night all over again - his friends by his side the entire way.

God he missed it so. The scheming, the partying, the pointless acts of juvenile rebellion… but most of all her. He couldn't describe how much he missed her. Her ruby red lips, her silky chocolate curls and her defiant wit that had never failed to both impress him and turn him on to levels that not even he had experienced.

He had never regretted a moment as much as he did the moment he didn't chase her. He'd had her right where he wanted her, she was officially his and wasn't ashamed to be and instead of relishing in the fact that someone so perfect could want someone as damaged as him.

But he didn't. He ran. Ran like the scared little boy he was inside, the boy incapable of loving someone, incapable to come to terms with what would happen to him if he lost them.

Was not loving someone better than experiencing love only to lose it? He still wasn't sure, but knowing that he would get to see her smiling face again, was enough to tempt him into coming to this "reunion" party tonight.

XOXO

She studied her figure in the mirror critically. Thighs too big, stomach not toned enough, breasts too small. She shook her head disapprovingly. It would have to do, she didn't have enough time to change anyway. Sighing, she straightened out the creases in her deep purple dress before picking up her clutch and gliding out of the room, her head held high despite how low she felt.

"You look radiant tonight Blair." his voice mumbled, not because he meant it but because it was now more of a chore which she fought the urge to roll her eyes at. Smiling lightly at his feeble attempt to reconnect she only nodded, afraid her voice would betray how she really felt. She touched his arm lightly as she reached up to peck him on the lips, effectively pushing him away as soon as he tried to deepen it.

He groaned, his face contorting in anger,

"How long are you going to push me away huh? How long?" he shouted, his frown deepening as he waited for her answer. She was silent.

"I can't change what happened Blair! I don't know how many times I have to apolog-"

"Would you please stop talking?" she felt tears prick at her eyes but she refused to let them fall - she'd spent far too much time on her make up to ruin it.

"We can talk later." she added, lacing her fingers through his as she led him across the shiny foyer and out the door hurriedly, not wanting to fight now. He exhaled heavily, shaking his head as he let her guide him out of their house to the town car which waited outside patiently for their arrival.

"I'm not dropping this Blair. It's not something you can just sweep under the rug like you do to everything else. We need to work throu-" she held her hand up to silence him, narrowing her eyes at him until his sentence drifted into nothingness. She closed her eyes as she fought with the emotions that were building inside her before stepping into the open car door, scooting over to make space for her husband.

Ten years, yet it felt like a lifetime had passed since her high school days when she was queen. Back then there was no betrayals, no commitments and life itself was just… easy. She could walk around without a care in the world, run her kingdom with a vice-like grip and no one ever challenged her. She was top of the world, or at least that was what it felt like at the time anyways. She had the looks, the money, the power and three of the best friends anyone could ask for by her side. Life had been flawless.

When had her life become so messed up? She couldn't even remember the last time she had no cares in the world and was truly happy. She ran her fingertips over the smooth material of her dress absentmindedly. It was unlikely he'd be there, but if he was, she knew he'd appreciate the colour. He always used to appreciate every fine detail.

She broke away from her thoughts and patted the soft leather seat beside her, motioning for her husband to join her. He ran a hand through his hair in annoyance before he slid into the seat beside her, seating as far away from her as possible.

"Don't think we're through with this." he bit out, casting his eyes away from hers, watching their house slowly disappear from view as the car pulled out of there lengthy driveway - the only sound passed between them the purring of the engine as they drove off into the night.

XOXO

A/N - Short I know! It just seemed like a good way to end it. This story won't be too long I don't think, it's just a little side project to my other story I Must Be Dreaming so probably only about 5 to 7 chapters. After watching the season 5 finale it dawned on me that Gossip Girl doesn't really have the spark that it used to and this idea popped in my head and wouldn't go away so - here it is.

If you think I should carry on, please review! It's a great motivator!


	2. Chapter 2

The Reunion: Chapter 1

XOXO

He was becoming impatient. It was way over an hour since the reunion had begun and yet she still wasn't here. The Blair Waldorf he knew was never late. He sighed heavily, turning away from the entrance door and back to the glossy open bar. This was how he spent most of his nights now, wallowing in the emptiness of unadulterated intoxication.

His life felt empty and it had felt that way ever since the seventeen year old girl that had crawled into the back of his limo and given him a part of herself that no one else would ever have, had walked away.

It had been the best night of his life.

No matter how many different women he fucked, how much time he spent in inebriation - she was the first thing he thought of when he awoke and the last thing he thought of before he drifted to sleep.

He was amazed at himself for not turning crazy over the past decade.

He ran his fingertip around the rim of his glass over and over, his eyes following the pattern as he got lost in his thoughts - ignorant to the world around him.

"Long time no see." his head snapped up at the sound of a voice from beside him. He turned and he couldn't stop the smirk that tugged at his lips at the sight of a much older looking vision of his best friend. He studied his appearance impressed at how much he had clearly matured over the years.

His eyes still retained the same gleam that they had in high school but the rest of his face showed the signs of age. He no longer looked like a lost young boy but like a powerful man. His face had filled out and his hair was slicked back in a fashion that would've made them both laugh ten years ago - but now it couldn't have suited him better.

"Nathaniel Archibald, I see life has treated you well over the years…" his eyes drifted to the vacant seat beside him which Nate soon slipped into, promptly ordering a whiskey on the rocks. He couldn't help but smile recalling the times when Nate had despised the taste of alcohol anything stronger than a beer. Nate followed his gaze and laughed lightly,

"Turns out beer isn't as good a stress reliever… really should have taken your advice sooner shouldn't I?" he shot him a grin before pouring the amber liquid down his throat, relishing the burn.

He chuckled, "Maybe life hasn't been so good over the years?" he pressed gently, the bitter tone in Nate's voice not escaping him. Nate sighed, his broad shoulders slumping, making him look _tired _for the first time. There were crevices in has face and his eyes looked worn out and weary. Nate tapped the rim of his empty glass, signalling the waiter to pour another just like Chuck had used to when they were sixteen - he'd taught him well.

"Family issues." he muttered, his fingers fiddling with the napkin that was lying on top of the bar. He'd never witnessed him so stressed, he used to be so relaxed and easy going but this guy was only a handsome shadow of his old self. Pushing his thoughts to the side Chuck scoffed to relieve the tension he could already feel building.

"Well you've come to the right place Nathaniel, family issues is my speciality…" he mumbled, toasting glasses with Nate as they both drained them empty.

"I assume you've heard of Bree Buckley." Nate mumbled absentmindedly.

"Who hasn't?" he countered. Nate heaved a sigh and clicked his tongue.

"I love her." he stated simply, the words just flowing off his tongue so naturally - the words that never failed to make Chuck feel a wash of guilt. Why could he never say it? It was three simple words… three words that stood between him and his angel and he just let them. He gulped watching his friend anxiously as the issues that those three simple words could bring began to swarm his mind.

"Isn't she the daughter of your fathers nemesis?" he asked gently, knowing Nate's answer before he even open his mouth to reply.

"If I stay with her… I lose everything." he began, the weight of his troubles becoming more and more visible on his face with every word he spoke. "My family, the company… the fortune. Nothing… I get nothing."

His heart bled for his best friends pain, wanting to just see the happy boy he had once known back again.

Change truly was a bastard - it ruined everything.

"I don't even know why I'm telling you this," Nate sniggered nervously, "I haven't even seen or heard from you in the past ten years and yet here I am, sat at a bar, telling you everything like nothing has changed."

For the first time, Nate looked at him, properly looked at him and felt a small sense of pride at the man before him. He looked good, aged, but good nonetheless.

"We've always been able to tell each other everything," Chuck began, not even realizing where his voice was coming from, "I guess some things don't change."

Nate mused this over, tilting his head back and forth before deciding that it couldn't hurt. It wasn't like there was anyone else he could tell.

"I don't know what to do. I don't think I've ever been so conflicted in my life… It's such a scary experience, but you know the scariest thing?" he paused, eyes drifting back down to study the bar, "I'd do it in a heartbeat."

"Do what in a heartbeat?" Nate only smiled, his thoughts seemingly miles away.

"Give it all up for her." he said with a sense of conviction laced in the words. "It scares me how much I'd give up for her… her smile is the only thing that gets me through the day and the thought that I'll be seeing her is enough to pull me out of whatever foul mood Granddad has managed to put me in." he took a sip of his refill to steady his shaking hands.

"I'm telling him tonight, telling him that even if it means I lose our fortune at least I'll have her. As you may have guessed I'm not looking forward to being the cause of WW3 I just… I just want someone to tell me that I'm making the right decision."

Nate looked up into his eyes once again, the gleam that used to seep from them now gone with only hollowness remaining. Before he could think of the consequences that could come down on his friend, Chuck found his answer slipping past his lips instantly.

"You're making the right decision." Nate's eyes widened and he seemed blatantly taken aback by his friends answer - obviously expecting him to try to change his mind. Nate straightened out his tie and shifted in his seat so that he could face him more directly.

"How are you so sure?" he asked gently, even though he was confident he knew the real reason.

"I know what it's like to lose something that means that much to you… and I regret it every waking hour of the day." Nate nodded, a smile creeping onto his face as the stress seemed to drain away and be replaced with what looked to be relief.

"So," Nate began, his voice returning to a more serious tone, "You still love her?"

Chuck paused, his heart hammering at the thought of voicing out loud his true feelings for Blair Waldorf for the first time in his life.

"For years now."

XOXO

Her veins were thrumming with nerves and energy as the town car came to a stop out of the grand building that had once been her kingdom. She felt a swell of nostalgia sweep through her body as she was flooded with the memories of her old life. She could see it now, her sat atop the highest step, her presence enough to make people desire to be her yet fear her all the same.

She'd be laughing, no doubt from a successful destruction of a fierce rival that just couldn't beat her - she was unbeatable to be fair. She'd have her friends laboured either side of her and slightly below her, (never higher; she was always the highest) and she'd be happy. Happy with Serena by her side, Penelope green with envy and Kati and Is looking at her with adoration. She'd have Nate's arm wrapped around her securely and her head resting on his shoulder. She'd be resting on her king but her pulse would always race at the feel of someone's perfectly slanted eyes watching her from afar with a sense of hunger that had been awaken in her in the backseat of a limo what felt like decades ago.

That was the problem. Even though she was only twenty eight, she felt as though she were in her early forties . She felt undesirable, damaged and only a shell of the vibrant creature she had once been. She missed feeling alive, wanted and desired.

She missed him. Oh how she hated to admit it after all of the hurt he had caused her but she missed him so badly she often fell asleep imagining it was his warm body lying beside her, wrapping his arms around her lovingly and kissing her on her temple… but it wasn't.

And she needed to learn to accept that he had never loved her. She had been left hanging, alone on an private airplane flying to Tuscany where she had met her future husband. If you read her life out from a piece of paper it sounded like the perfect fairytale but the moment you began to live it, it turned into a dark, haunting nightmare.

Duchess Blair Cornelia Waldorf… how fucking impressive - such a vast achievement. She should feel such a sense of pride when she hears people introduce her at events, everyone's eyes looking up at the _Duchess _in awe but she just feels empty. Turns out after all those years spent striving for a title, once she had obtained it she realized just how shallow it really was.

Who actually gave a damn about anything anymore?

"You coming?" she jumped, noticing that the car was much colder than it had been when she'd first gotten in. She peeled her eyes away from the window to face Marcus who held the door open for her, his fingers tapping on the polished surface impatiently. She cleared her throat as she slid out of the seat, shivering as she stepped into the cool night.

She walked briskly up the path, ignoring the powerful slam of the car door and the sound of Marcus' disdainful mutterings as he hurried to catch up with her.

"Would you just slow down?" he hissed, grabbing her by the arm and tugging her towards him. She crashed into his chest and he wrapped his strong arms around her in a hug that should have been warm and comforting but instead felt hostile and vacant. It didn't feel _right. _

She remained still until he eventually pulled away, looking at her with sorrowful eyes. His hands grasped both of her arms, holding her in place in front of him. He loosened his grip and heaved a heavy sigh, running his hands up and down her arms.

"Please Blair… we haven't so much as kissed properly in weeks," he followed her gaze with his eyes no matter how much she tried to avert hers from his (not because she would lose herself in his gaze but because she couldn't stand to look him in the eye, he made her sick.)

"I'm going out of my mind," he continued, adding just the right amount of sadness into his words to make them seem almost sincere. "Please Blair… stop pushing me away… I need you and I'm sorry, for everything." he leaned in, running a fingertip along her plump lips. She was about to push him away when she realized just how much attention their arrival had caused by other people, all milling around, waiting to talk to the Duke and Duchess who were in their midst.

She could almost smell the desperation for social anarchy.

Not wanting to draw any attention to herself, or give anyone any reason to believe her life was not the picture perfect fairytale she fought so hard to create - she nodded slightly, craning her head up to meet his lips.

Their lips touched but it was void of any passion. His lips felt cold and her entire body felt tense as his hands snaked around her back and his tongue plundered in her mouth. It made her feel dirty. She could feel the self assured grin that rose on his face as she heard the buzz of gossiping onlookers cooing over the "public display of affection".

Subtly, she pushed him away, plastering a smile on her face as she reached up and placed a final peck to his lips before entwining their fingers and leading him up the Mett Steps and through the looming mahogany door which lead to her old life.

XOXO

Her eyes examined the elegant room before her, each detail bringing wave after wave of memories. Everything looked the same. The polished floor with the intricate patterns, the portraits hung on each wall donning the crafted paintings of the head teachers going right back to the 1800's. Her heart swelled at the sight before her, recommitting each section to her mind - never wanting to forget it, never wanting to forget who she _really _was.

She spotted old friends mingling on the wooden staircase which led to the upper floor and she ached to talk to them, reconnect with them… but too much time had passed. Many of her friends had kept in contact since school, but once she'd married The Lord she'd just been so busy. There were luncheons, parties, board meetings and royal festivities she'd had to attend.

Her life had gotten even _more _hectic around four months ago when both the Duke and Duchess had been in a tragic car crash and both passed away. The title had been handed down to her and Marcus and suddenly it felt as if there was no way out. She now had commitments, people who relied on her and looked up to her and people who watched her every move.

It was no wonder her marriage began to crumble right before her eyes. Not that it had ever been right in the first place.

"Drink Madame?" Blair snapped out of her reverie, turning her focus to the young, chiselled waiter before her, crystal champagne placed atop the silver plated tray. She graciously accepted a flute, sipping at the bubbly liquid slowly even though she wanted nothing more than to drown her sorrows at the bottom of a glass.

"Oh my god… Blair? Is that you?" her ears perked up when she recognized the melodic voice of her once best friend Serena van der Woodsen. Before she could reply she was swept into a bone crushing hug. Her arms wrapped tightly around her friend, her hand clutching to her as she felt her eyes water with happiness.

Serena. She hadn't seen her in years. She smelt the same and Blair's heart ached at the thought of just how long she had stayed away… how were it even possible to stay away from her for so long? She was her best friend, in the world, and there had been a time where she believed that would never change.

But it had.

"Serena? Oh my god how are you?" she breathed, not letting her grip of her friend go, almost afraid that if she did she would vanish, "It's been too long!" she added, wiping away a small tear that threatened to fall.

Serena pulled away and her face matched that of Blair's, both etched with happiness and relief. She looked fabulous as always, wearing a royal blue dress that fell to just above her knees, elaborate diamonds tracing along the tight fitted bodice that gave her figure a flawless curve.. Her trademark gold locks spilled over her shoulder and glistened in the light that shone over her. She had only gotten more beautiful with age.

Her hands reached up to touch Blair's cheeks, a magnificent smile covering her face. Almost as if she suddenly remembered her manners which had been drilled into her from such an early age.

She stepped back from Blair and outstretched her hand to Marcus, smiling sweetly at him.

"Where are my manners? I'm Serena van der Woodsen, Blair's friend," both girls cringed slightly at the term friend… they had once been so much more, "And you must be Marcus Beaton, such an honour to finally meet you." she shook his hand.

He nodded at her, returning her smile.

"Great to meet you too, any friend of Blair's is a friend of mine." he dropped her hand and placed a soft kiss to Blair's cheek, "Now I can see how much catching up you two have to do so I shall leave you to it." he then slipped away and for the first time in months, Blair felt a small sense of gratitude swell within her.

As soon as he was gone, Serena grabbed onto Blair and led her to an elegant seating area in the corner of the room where they wouldn't be interrupted. They took a seat away from the prying eyes all trying to catch a glimpse of the Duchess.

"Oh Serena, it's been so long… how are you?" she asked, covering Serena's hand in hers. Serena broke out into a smile and a dreamy look flitted over her face. Slowly she lifted her left hand, a shy smile spreading over her face. Blair's eyes drifted down landing on the subtle rock which donned her ring finger.

"No way…" Blair breathed, beaming at how excited and genuinely happy Serena looked. She look more radiant than ever at that specific moment in time. Serena only nodded, her long blonde locks flailing about as she squealed with delight - which Blair soon joined her in doing.

"Oh my goodness! Who's the lucky guy?" Blair cooed, snatching Serena's hand to get a closer look at the ring, admiring the delicate handiwork which went into the design. It was a thin golden band which a gleaming sapphire was nestled in. It was gorgeous yet understated… it was totally Serena.

Serena laughed gently, "Well, you might not believe it but I'm about to become Serena Celia Baizen!" Blair's mouth hung open in shock.

"No way! Carter Baizen? Well I never! Oh I'm so happy for you S!" she teased, "I'd always thought that you would one day become Serena Celia Archibald. You two had always seemed to be destiny." Serena giggled, flattered by the approval of Blair Waldorf. She'd never told her, but Blair had always been her toughest critic too.

"I could say the same for you!" Serena countered, tapping her gently on the nose whilst Blair looked at her in confusion.

"What do you mean? Nate and I? As if! We were a car crash waiting to happen…" she hadn't felt this comfortable in so long. Bantering with Serena was most definitely an activity which she missed. Serena shook her head, swallowing a mouth full of champagne before continuing,

"Of course not, you and Chuck," she didn't notice the way Blair froze at the mention of his name, "I always thought that you two would get married. I would've bet on it in fact that you would've one day been called Blair Bass." she paused, studying Blair's glazed eyes.

"I guess things have changed though haven't they Blair?" when she garnered no response from her, she pushed on, not realizing just how much Blair was coming undone inside from the thoughts of him - that Chuck Basstard.

"Enough about me anyways, how are you? How is it to be the Duchess?" her eyes gleamed with a sense of pride for her and the look made Blair feel rotten. "And may I add, the Duke is delicious!" she grinned, nudging her gently. Blair smiled politely, her stomach nauseas.

"It's fabulous," she began, the lies she was so accustomed to telling surfacing, "I get to go to such amazing festivities and, people recognize me everywhere… I guess I got everything I always wanted." she fibbed, desperate to change the conversation - unfortunately for her Serena was having none of it.

"Blah, blah, blah… I meant how is it with the Duke?" she paused, biting her lip, "Are you happy?"

Blair was taken aback. In all of the years she had been with Marcus, never had anyone cared for her feelings enough to ever ask _if _she was happy. They all just assumed she was. Blair paused, looking deeply into Serena's eyes - lying was the best option, it saved her from having to explain the entire fuck up that she called a marriage.

"It's wonderful. He's so handsome and kind and car-" she stopped suddenly, her throat closing up and she was lost for words. The look of pure concern donning Serena's face was too much. She couldn't keep this lie up any longer. She would surely go insane if she didn't share how she really felt. "… I hate it." she finished, her lower lip trembling slightly.

Serena's eyes bugged open and she shifted her seat closer to Blair's.

"B, what's wrong?" the sound of her old nickname brought tears to her eyes. Oh how she had missed all of this. It had only been a matter of minutes and yet she felt closer connected to Serena than she had to her own husband who had been sharing her bed for the past ten years.

"Oh S, I don't even know where to begin. It's so hard, I never realized how hard it would be to keep up this façade of a fairytale. I'm not happy… I'm not even close." she sobbed, nestling her head into Serena's neck, letting the silent tears fall for the first time.

"Let it out B, just let it out, I'm right here." Serena cooed, running her hand up and down Blair's small back soothingly. She hated seeing her friend like this. She'd always been the strong one out of the two and seeing her so broken and fragile was something that Serena did not enjoy seeing.

"How did my life turn out like this S?" she snivelled, wiping the tears away from her eyes, "Stuck in a loveless marriage at twenty eight and with no accomplishments, nothing to show for anything… I'm a disgrace." she cried, straining as hard as possible to stop the tears from pouring - with little success.

"Blair, stop." Serena sympathised, turning Blair's head so that she would look her directly in the eye, "Listen to me… do you remember years ago, when Georgie came back and she led me back to my old ways?" Blair nodded slightly, her lower lip quivering. Serena fought against the tears which threatened to fall for her best friend.

"Do you remember what you did?" Blair paused, clearly confused as to what she was talking about. Serena continued anyways,

"You forced me to go to counselling and you went to every single meeting with me. I was locked up in the Ostroff Centre for months and you came to see me every single day. I was a mess, at the lowest I've ever been in my life and even after everything that had happened with Nate and your mom… you still stuck with me regardless."

She gave her a comforting smile, wiping away the mascara that was beginning to run down her tanned cheeks.

"You didn't know it Blair, but you saved my life that night. You got me clean and you put up with my bitchy, selfish, arrogant self through it all… I owe you everything Blair."

"You don't owe me anything."

"On the contrary, I really do. You were there for me when I was in trouble. Now I'm gonna be here for you." Blair gave her a grateful smile but then shook her head.

"Thank you so much for trying but… I can't leave Marcus." Serena frowned, pulling away from her slightly, her eyes full of confusion.

"Why not? You're not happy Blair - _he_ can't make you happy… but we both know someone who can." she let her voice trail off, knowing just by the look in Blair's eyes that she understood exactly what she meant. She tensed, the memories of him she'd tried to keep at a distance slowly creeping out of the crevices of her mind - making themselves painfully known again. She clenched her eyes shut, trying to block out the pain of _him _again.

She wished things hadn't ended like they did. If they hadn't, there was a big chance that it would have been his ring on her finger by now and that was the most painful thing. Did she give up too early?

No. He didn't love her - it would've been a replica of her marriage now, loveless. The only difference would be that she would've loved him, no matter whether he returned it or not, and the idea of being in a marriage with someone who you loved but who didn't love you back seemed a hell of a lot more painful than a marriage where neither half loved the other.

It was much emptier - but it was easier, less heart-rending.

"It isn't enough." Blair sighed, gracefully lifting herself out of the velvet cushioned chair, her hands nimbly fixing stray pieces of hair that had fallen out of her once pristine updo. "He doesn't love me and I can't let myself fall for a guy like him again… I'll only end up getting hurt." she argued meekly, motioning for Serena to follow her - she didn't move an inch.

"Please." Serena muttered, rolling her eyes. Indignation rose within Blair as she watched her friend,

"What's that supposed to mean?" she demanded, her eyes locking with Serena's. Slowly, Serena stood from the chair and sauntered towards Blair, her eyes hard yet at the same time pleading.

"It means that you can't fall for him again when you never stopped in the first place." she defied, her eyes softening at the thought of Blair living with so many conflicting feelings for so long whilst she had been so blissfully happy with Carter.

Blair had always been there for her, but when Blair needed her the most… where had she been? Trekking around the world with Carter, experiencing some of the most exciting adventures of her life. Shark cage diving in Hawaii, trekking through Indonesia rainforests, abseiling down Niagra Falls, skinny dipping through the Zakynthos Blue Caves - you name it; they'd done it. Or course she'd heard about Blair but she just hadn't bothered questioning whether she was happy or not. Boy did she regret that now.

She'd spared her a phone call to congratulate her and she'd sounded happy enough… oh how wrong she'd been. She wished so much that she could go back in time and be there for Blair - advise her not to marry Marcus. It would've saved the poor girl so much heartache.

Blair regarded her for a moment before letting her eyes drop to the ground below and for the first time that night Serena noticed just how skinny she looked. She looked almost ready to snap.

She needed more help than Serena had first thought and she was going to help her this time no matter what. She was going to stick by her through it all like she should've done long ago - before this mess happened. Swallowing the urge to yell at her until she saw sense, she approached the frail creature facing her, wrapping her arms around her small frame silently.

"C'mon… lets get you cleaned up." she smiled, motioning to the mascara staining her cheeks. Together, they walked out of the hallway and down the wide, arched corridors towards the girls bathroom. Arm in arm, best friends, the way they were always supposed to be.

XOXO

"Nate! How good to see you again!" Chuck and Nate both turned to face Marcus Beaton as he meandered his way through the crowd of people. Nate fought the urge to roll his eyes as he greeted the pompous asshole that he had had to escort around the Vanderbuilt Estate a few years back. If there was one thing that annoyed him more than anything, it was feeling like you were being looked down on - something which Marcus Beaton specialised in.

"Marcus, haven't seen you in a while." Nate mumbled, barely acknowledging him as he took another swig of his whiskey - whilst Chuck tried his hardest not to laugh. _Who the hell was this guy?_

"Yes, why I was speaking to your grandfather only yesterday." he added, clearly not about to take the hint to leave as he joined them at the bar. He signalled to the bartender before ordering a margarita… a fucking _margarita_. Chuck couldn't help but wrinkle his nose in disdain.

"Oh really," Nate breathed, his tone dripping in boredom, "And what did he have to say…"

Chuck glanced over the guy. He was clean-cut that's for sure and he was relatively good looking but something about this guy instantly pissed him off. He seemed too… smug? He couldn't quite but his finger on it.

"Same old, same old… you know, Blair and I really need to visit the estate again sometime, it's so gorgeous and let me tell you… she most definitely _appreciates _being surrounded by beauty - if you catch my drift." he included haughtily.

Chuck's eyes widened in surprise and he almost spat his drink over the bar in pure horror. No way. No way would Blair sleep with…_ this _guy! Not his Blair anyways. His eyes flew to Nate's for support, but he seemed undeterred - almost like this wasn't news to him.

"Pardon me one moment." Chuck ground out, seizing Nate by the arm and dragging him off the bar stool to a more private section of the room. His mind was racing as he paced back and forth - his heart beating so vigorously he thought it might burst.

Surely not… please, don't let his assumptions be correct - please.

"Nathaniel…" Chuck began, his voice wavering from the emotion of it all, trying to contain himself as best as he could. "Would you care to explain to me… exactly, how that self righteous prick back there knows Blair?"

Nate cocked his head to the side, almost as if he were trying to figure out whether he was joking or not. His eyes then widened in surprise as he deciphered the truth. _Chuck didn't know… he had no idea that Blair was no longer a "Waldorf". _Nate flexed his fingertips, worried as to how his friend would take the news.

"I… Chuck I- I thought you knew…" he stammered, his palms beginning to sweat knowing what a rampage this could cause his unstable friend to go on. He knew that behind Chuck's macho disguise, he was just a scared little boy who loved Blair Waldorf a little bit too much for his own good.

Chuck's eyebrows rose, trying to read Nate's face for the answer.

"Knew what Nate? What was I supposed to know?" he spat coarsely, his heart thrumming with tension.

"Chuck… Blair erm- Blair's married." he shied away, slightly worried at what Chuck was going to do. "The guy at the bar? That's Marcus Beaton… he's a Duke… and he's- he's Blair's husband." he stuttered, watching as the colour drained away from Chuck's face. He could almost hear his friends heart breaking at the newly discovered news.

Chuck felt his body sink, his face falling and his heart dropping to the pit of his stomach. He felt a rush of bittersweet nausea swarm around within him.

It couldn't be. His Blair… his beautiful, beautiful Blair was married? To a guy who wasn't him. He wanted to punch something. Life was too fucking sad. He had to admit, he was impressed with himself that his knees did not give way and he managed to retain a shred of his composure.

His eyes drifted back to the bar, glowering at the spineless man that sat at the bar, deep in conversation with a barmaid who was revealing a little too much flesh for Chuck's liking at this situation in time.

He gulped, his eyes clenching shut in the heartbreaking agony that charged through him.

"Is she here?" he asked quietly, his shoulders slumped forward. Nate was silent for a moment before he nodded slowly.

"She came with him." he stated simply, sending sympathetic glances towards Chuck who's jaw was clenched so tight it looked almost ready to snap.

"I'm going to find her." Chuck whispered, before he stalked away from Nate, ignoring his cries of protest for him to 'stop and think about what he was doing' as he thundered down the corridor - his eyes scanning everywhere for his love.

It may be too late, but he was going to tell her. To love and lose _is _better than to never have experienced love before.

XOXO

Well here it is! I cut it here because it was getting so long I was beginning to surprise myself. I hope you like it and please review! Motivation is a key factor of the speed my stories get completed as I love hearing your thoughts and takes on my stories. Thank you loads, review!


	3. Chapter 3

The Reunion: Chapter 3

XOXO

"I'm sorry about what happened back there." Blair sniffed, rubbing at her reddening face, make up stained tissues scattering the marble countertop that she was perched on, her feet swinging back and forth leisurely. Serena lied across the top, her bare feet resting slightly on Blair's thigh as she surveyed her.

Her eyes were cast downwards and her small fingertips clung onto the marble, her knuckles almost white.

"Don't worry about it, you've witnessed a fair share of my meltdowns over the years." Blair only smiled gently, her eyes trained on the floor.

Serena had seen her in some pretty dire conditions, yet never had she felt as hopeless as she did at that moment in time. Blair seemed as though she were miles away - isolated. She had never seen her friend look so miserable and never had she once witnessed a 'Waldorf Meltdown' where she had completely seemed to have lost control of both herself, and the situation.

She could see now with a devastating clarity that the Blair Waldorf she had come to know and once called her best friend was no longer alive.

In her place was a frail, drained, skeletal version - and it physically pained her to see her this way. Nobody, not even her worst enemy, deserved this. This was pure torture, and how Blair had managed to cope being so alone for all these years was unbeknownst to her.

"I tried." Blair muttered, not particularly to anyone, just to voice it. Serena raised her eyes to Blair's lingeringly, waiting for her to continue. If there was one thing she had learnt over the years about her friend was that all she had ever needed was time, attention and just someone to listen.

She gulped, wringing her hands together repeatedly - her gaze never once leaving the floor almost as if she were unable to look Serena in the eye.

"I tried to make it work. Marcus and I. I just… I wanted to do something for myself. Something that would make people proud of me." she paused, her voice wavering with emotion whilst Serena waited patiently.

"I'm right here, carry on, you can do it." she soothed, not daring to touch her - she didn't want to break her out of the trance she seemed to have fallen under.

"It worked I guess. I'm the Duchess now after all… but I wish so much that I wasn't. I'm gonna be thirty soon and what have I really accomplished with my life? I'm living in the shadow of a man, something I swore I would never do. I'm an ignominy." she snivelled, dabbing at the tears that rose in her eyes.

Serena nodded, collecting her thoughts.

"You're not an ignominy Blair. You are the most powerful woman I know." she appeased, rubbing Blair's arm for support. "How you managed to stay in a marriage like yours and not go completely crazy I don't know… but that's not the only reason your marriage is hard is it?" she prompted, her eyes knowing.

Blair sniffled, conceding.

"No." she stated simply, yet it seemed to be the hardest thing for her to admit. Still Serena lingered, serene. A single tear slid down Blair's face as she tried to regain her composure.

"I never got over him." she whispered, her lower lip trembling. "I… miss him, still."

Serena nodded her head knowingly, anyone with half a brain could see from a mile off just how much Chuck and Blair loved each other when they were together - even more so when they were apart.

They didn't seem to be able to focus properly without the other, it were as though a part of them were lost and only the other could find that crucial, missing part. It was so heartbreaking to watch two characters self destruct, knowing that the answer to all of the problems was so simple. Serena shifted closer to Blair, pushing her hair out of her puffy eyes.

"You listen to me okay? You can't live like this - it's benefiting no one." Blair was about to interrupt but Serena silenced her. "No I'm serious. You're not happy, Chuck's not happy and I very much doubt that the Duke is happy. Why would you put yourself through this?" she almost whined from exhaustion.

Blair pressed her lips together - was Serena right? Was staying with the Duke only denying everyone's happiness?

"What does it matter?" Blair murmured, the pain in her chest rising and falling with repressed emotions. Serena cocked her eyebrow,

"What does what matter?"

"Chuck doesn't want me - I haven't seen him in ten years for crying out loud! So, I leave the Duke… and then I'm alone and without a title. Or, I can stay with the Duke, push through and _make _it work - and I remain a Duchess." she forced an almost convincing smile onto her sullen features, "I get everything I ever wanted. What's to contemplate?"

Before Serena could interject a word in either ways, Blair slid off the counter and stalked out of the door - leaving her friend hindered and discouraged.

She couldn't believe she had ever even _considered _the thought of her and Chuck. Had she forgotten it all? All the hurt? All the anguish? All the lies and manipulation?

No - but that was the problem.

She knew she must have masochistic qualities as she remembered everything - the ups, downs and everything in between, yet she loved him regardless. She loved the way he'd moan her name whilst he was buried deep inside of her, the way he'd smirk as he plotted and schemed alongside her… but most of all she loved the way he smiled.

It was a rare occurrence to see him really smile; a genuine, carefree smile but during the small space of time when they had been together, she had grown accustomed to being greeted in the morning by his smile. It had been the best view to wake up to and she longed for it everyday she woke up beside Marcus, wishing that he could awaken the same primal passion inside her that Chuck was able to trigger by simply standing in the same room as her.

Why couldn't he have just grown to love her?

She viciously wiped away the tears as she hurried down the empty corridor, the only sound her shaky breaths and the _click, clack_ of her polished Louboutin's. She turned the corner briskly, wanting to get away from Serena as soon as possible when she crashed into someone. She felt her balance waver before a set of strong, muscular arms encircled her; steadying her stance.

"Oh no, I'm so sorry I-" she was cut off as she inhaled the same musky, cologned scent that had plagued her mercilessly for years. She daren't lift her eyes to meet his, instead she just froze, relishing herself in his aroma - her hands clutched onto the bulge of his arm tightly.

"Bass?" she breathed, restraining herself from nuzzling her head into his shirt. She felt him chuckle at the use of the name only she had ever referred to him as. _God he loved her._

"Waldorf." his voice was still oozing with confidence after all this time and it sent chills running up her spine. He sounded the same as he had ten years ago, the only difference being that his voice had seemed to only get huskier as he got older, much to her great pleasure. "Or should I say Beaton?" she didn't miss the steely edge in his voice and she felt herself cringe in response.

He knew.

Gathering her breath she finally looked up to meet him in the eye and she felt the same electricity that she'd felt all those years ago still present between them - some kind of palpable tension.

In that moment, she wanted nothing more than him. It didn't matter the place, she just needed to feel alive again and she had no doubt that he was the only man with the capability to do that.

_What about Marcus? Do you not think you owe it to him to remain faithful and not whore yourself around?_ The critical voice of her mother horded her mind making her feel small and insignificant. Her happiness had never mattered to her mother. Her mother was one of the reasons why she daren't leave the Duke. Ever since she'd become Duchess, it seemed as though her mother viewed her with new founded respect - which was something she had worked so hard for.

_Go find the Duke._

_Stay with Chuck._

_You have a duty._

_You deserve to be happy._

The conflicting voices of her mother and Serena filled her mind, dizzying her. What was she supposed to do? The right thing, or the one thing she craved more than anything?

Wordlessly, she ran her hand down his coated arm and laced her fingertips through his as she led him down the hallway and into the Headmaster's office. She dragged him inside, making sure no one had seen and immediately locking the door behind her. Finally, they were alone.

She'd made her decision. Happiness, even if only for one night, was something she deserved.

XOXO

There was an overwhelming silence as they both just examined each other from opposite ends of the darkened room, soaking in all that they had missed. Chuck lent indifferently against the tightly closed door, whilst Blair stood awkwardly shifting from foot to foot before the heavy, oak headmasters desk.

He studied her, his pants tightening almost instantly. She looked incredible. His eyes devoured every inch, trailing from her flawless curls, down her slender neck to her pert breasts that were enclosed in a tight fitted purple bodice. His favourite.

Age truly had treated her flawlessly. She had matured since high school and had only gotten more beautiful. He had never thought that were possible.

_Her husband is one lucky guy,_ he thought sadly, tearing his eyes away. He had to remember that no matter how much her appearance screamed 'take me now'… she just wasn't his to take anymore - hadn't been in a very long time.

XOXO

She felt ready to pounce. He had aged to perfection and she had never found him this attractive before. His chest had filled out, and she could see he had exonerated himself from his signature scarf and untidy hair for a more matured, slicked back look. His almond eyes still held the passionate, fiery gaze they always had and watching him, watching her had turned her on to unimaginable levels.

_Whoever he marries is gonna be one lucky girl, _she thought enviously, ripping her eyes away. No matter how much she wanted him to pin her against the wall and pound inside of her with no restraint… he didn't feel for her the way he used to. They weren't in high school anymore.

She cleared her throat, meeting his ardent eyes.

"So… how are you?" she asked, cursing herself silently for asking such a impersonal question. Was that really the best she could come up with?

He seemed to sense her shame and he smirked in response.

"Please, skip with the pleasantries Beaton," they both cringed inwardly at the name she now possessed, "we have a much more profound relationship than that. How about something more intimate?" he felt waves of indignation run through his veins as his eyes caught sight of the ring that her finger now bore.

Something in him seemed to crack.

"No invitation for me to the wedding of the century?" he spat, knowing it was not fair to her to act this way but not seeming to be able to stop himself regardless. Her eyes flittered to the ground in disgrace.

The truth of the matter was that she had intentionally not invited any of her personal friends. Nate, Serena, Chuck… none of them had been asked to attend as one look at them would have changed her mind about the entire thing - and she couldn't risk that happening.

"I didn't really think weddings were your thing Bass," she returned, impressed with herself at how poised her voice sounded, "I'd always thought cheap, unctuous brothels were more your style?" her eyes flared as she met his gaze with a burning intensity.

He grinned, his eyes gleaming in amusement as he admired her in her element. One thing he knew about Blair _Waldorf _was that when she was in a dispute, she would always come out fighting and on most occasions came out on top.

He wanted nothing more right now then to silence those pouting lips with his, his pants becoming unbearably tight at the mere thought.

"Oh of course, because you seem to know so much about me don't you?" he retorted, raising his eyes in unconcealed challenge, stealthily skulking towards her. Her beautiful eyes broke away from his and fell to rest on the ground, biting her lip in an achingly adorable manner.

"I did once…" she paused, her eyebrows knitting, "You're not as complicated as you like to think you are you know."

"Well a lot changes in ten years it seems doesn't it?" he murmured acrimoniously, clearly denoting the Duke. Blair sneered, the bitchiness she'd kept locked away for so long finally creeping out of the box which she'd buried it in - she could feel her power returning with every breath she took and she had to say, it felt invigorating.

"I guess it does doesn't it. I mean look at me now," she stepped towards him seemingly calmly, even though she could feel her insides rapidly beginning to pulsate in excitement, "married to the most wonderful man I've met in a long time and a Duchess. Love and power. Seems I've achieved the two things I always aimed for wouldn't you say?"

A wounded look crossed Chuck's face before he promptly wiped it away - but Blair didn't miss it. She couldn't help but feel a slight swell of triumph inside at the prospect of hurting him. She knew it was wrong and she knew it were a horrible thing to feel, but she couldn't help but believe that she deserved at least that.

He deserved punishment for what he did to her and if she were the one to dish it out the better.

"Please," Chuck scowled, "that pathetic human you call a husband is an asshole. One would think you deserved better…"

"Like you?" Blair cried in exasperation, promptly bringing the tense exchange to an abrupt end. They both studied each other, chests heaving, their eyes burning each other to memory - both afraid this may be their last chance to see the other.

An awkward silence filled the room once again as both were completely, for once in their lives, at a loss for words.

Blair leant back against the polished desk, her fingers digging into the wood as she tried to gather her thoughts to form a coherent sentence. Chuck on the other hand, traced his eyes over the curve of her body as he fought to restrain himself. He knew he was at a loss as soon her tongue darted out to run along her bottom lip. She was completely irresistible.

He couldn't deny himself anymore. In a matter of three strides he had reached her and deftly wrapped his arms around her frame, lifting her onto the desk. Their foreheads touched as he looked deep into her shining brown orbs that gazed up at him, filled with a look of repressed longing.

Pushing her legs apart softly, he settled himself between them, the bulge of his pants pressing against her rapidly increasing wetness making Blair's eyes roll back in need. She ran her hands nimbly up his arms until they came to rest on the taut columns of his neck, running her finger pads along his smooth skin. Chuck's hand pressed against her cheek lovingly as his lips swooped down to meet hers.

XOXO

A/N: Evil place to leave it I know. I just wanted to say thank you guys so much for the lovely reviews, it was so great to read through them and see your thoughts on the story. Hope you enjoyed this chapter, please review!


	4. Chapter 4

The Reunion: Chapter 4

A/N - *This chapter contains some minor M scenes.* - it also contains quite a lot Serena/Nate scenes but you can just skip straight to the end scene and it will still make sense if you only want to read the Chuck/Blair parts. I'm a big S/N fan and the middle of this chapter focuses largely on them and the struggle of saying goodbye to a relationship you never thought you'd say goodbye to. I thought that they too deserved a happy ending and this will be pretty much the last you'll see of them in this story. Million apologies for the stupidly long wait but coursework has been mounting for me and I barely have anytime to sit down! Hope you enjoy this chapter!

XOXO

Blair's moans was the only sound which filled the dark room as Chuck's long fingers stroked her core. Words could not describe just how much her body had missed his touch - it was like only Chuck could awaken her wanton needs.

She pushed herself closer towards him, wrapping her arms securely around his strong neck as he pushed first one, then two, then three fingers deep into her hot centre.

"Fuck Blair," Chuck groaned, his eyes shutting as the passion he felt for her still swarmed through his body. "You're so wet." he opened his eyes to be met with a sight that would be imprinted on his memory forever. Her once pristine purple dress was now bunched up around her milky thighs, her hair falling out of its once secure hold, the stray pieces cradling her flushed pink cheeks. This was how he liked her.

He liked her when she looked ravished, unkempt, wild. She may look positively delectable when she was dressed to her highest potential. However, whenever Chuck glimpsed her like that, the only thoughts that flooded his mind was the joy he would take in removing and tainting it. Blair may seem cool and collected on the surface but inside she was untamed, passionate and a vixen - his own dirty vixen.

Blair eyes rolled back in her head as she traced her finger along his jaw, drawing his lips back towards hers as they met with a fiery kiss. She sighed into his lips as she felt her body tightening - her release building rapidly.

"I'm so close for you Chuck." she whimpered into his ear as he increased his speed, rubbing his rough pad against her hidden spot, the spot that only he had discovered - the spot that caused Blair to completely lose control. Her hips rocked as she felt the tension building inside her abdomen, her teeth biting down on her plump lips in a unsuccessful attempt to prevent her screams from escaping and echoing out into the silent corridor.

Ten years had passed and not once had either of them felt like this since the last time they had spent with the other. Once Blair had left, Chuck had subdued to a life of drugs, alcohol and women - but no matter how much money he spent or how many women came and left his bed, nothing could compare to her. Nothing could compare to his angel.

He watched her brazenly, revelling in the way she threw her head back in ecstasy as she came hard around his fingers - shrill cries escaping her mouth. He crashed his lips against hers, swallowing her cries to ensure that no one heard.

No matter how much he wanted to hear her voice her appreciation for his skills, he knew no one could know about what had just happened here. He knew that despite what had just happened here, that she was not his… she was still married to Marcus.

Blair's mind was in a haze as her body was wracked with overwhelming, pleasurable sensations. Her eyes were shut tight as she let the sensations saturate her, wanting to make the feeling last for as long as possible. Their lips connected once again softly as Blair's lips searched blindly for his, her fingers delicately tracing patterns into his muscular back.

"Wow." Chuck breathed out shakily as he placed a gentle kiss to her ear. Blair smiled, nuzzling into his large chest feeling safe - safe as long as she was ensconced in his arms. Being with him again, only for that brief space of time had made her feel so alive she couldn't bare the mere idea of going a single day without it.

They remained like that for a few moments, just relishing the feel of the other - never letting the other out of their reach.

"Chuck?" Blair whispered, pressing soft kisses along his chiselled jaw line. His left hand gripped her hip roughly whilst his right carefully straightened her bunched dress.

"Mmhmm?" she pressed herself into him subconsciously - earning a shudder from Chuck. Her glassy doe eyes rose to meet his, their sad depths reaching out to him, silently begging him to make her whole again.

"I need more." her right hand trailed down to his belt, steadily undoing the buckle as her left hand rose to cradle his face. He was about to lean into her kiss when he felt the cool metal band of her wedding ring touch his cheek - burning him, offending him. He pulled back abruptly, stalking away from Blair - leaving her bewildered.

He ran his hand along his neck, cursing himself for giving in so easily. What good had this done? He'd just finger-fucked the girl of his dreams (who happened to be married to someone who wasn't him) on their headmasters old desk… but what happened now?

Nothing. Nothing would change after this night. She'd go back to her perfect charade of a life and he would be left shallow and empty, falling asleep to the memory of her head thrown back in satisfaction.

Well he wouldn't stand for it, not this time. He would no longer be her dirty little secret.

"I'm sorry Blair… I can't give you more." his eyes met hers not shying away from her confused eyes. She closed her legs embarrassedly, as if she just noticed they were still spread open. She cautiously slid off the table, taking steady steps towards Chuck - their eyes never wavering.

"What do you mean?" she placated, attempting to place a hand on his shoulder, which he instantly swatted away - almost like he was too repulsed to touch her. Her mouth hung open slightly and she tried her hardest to hide the pain that flashed in her eyes albeit she could already feel the salty tears prick her eyes.

Her chest heaved as all sorts of possibilities began to flood her mind.

_Had he used her? Was she just another fuck? He was bored and who better to screw then Blair Waldorf, his number one lay over?_

She felt her cheeks redden at the thought. How could he do this to her? The tears spilled over and ran down her flushed cheeks falling to the ground silently. Wrapping her arms around herself, trying her hardest to fix her dishevelled appearance. How was she going to face Marcus tonight? He was going to tell, there was no way she could act like nothing had happened this evening seeing as she had spent most of her time either in ecstasy or tears.

"Did I do something?" she snivelled, trying to void her voice of emotion - to no avail. Chuck sighed, grasping at his tousled hair in frustration.

"I can't do this Blair."

"Do what?"

"This, I can't do _this _anymore." he motioned between the two of them with his long, pointed finger. Blair choked back a sob.

"I don't understand. You were fine a matter of minutes ago…" indignation rose within her as the patronizing voice of her mother flooded her mind,

_You're a tramp._

_You don't deserve anything._

_I never did understand what the Duke saw in you, he could do so much better._

_Maybe never time you shouldn't spread your legs the second HE walks into the room._

Her momentary compunction was pushed to the back of her mind as fury began to take over. Who did he think he was?

"I'm not just a sex toy you know _Chuck_," she spat his name with an edge of bitterness, "You can't just pick me up when you want me then toss me aside when you're done. I'm better than that!" she snapped, her eyebrows knitted together in anger. Her shoulders slumped,

"You know, I don't know why I let you do this to me again and again, you can't be trusted with anything…" she sucked in a breath. There was no holding back now, she was going to tell him exactly how she felt. "I can never rely on you. One night. That's all I wanted and you couldn't even give me that!" she scoffed.

"It's not like I asked for your love either." instantly the tension in the room multiplied as Chuck noticeably stiffened as soon as she uttered the word. "All I wanted was sex - you of all people should have been able to give me that!" she shoved him hard in the chest, trying to get a rise out of him. She needed this, she needed to see that he cared.

"I mean, how many whores have you slept with since we broke up in high school huh? Bet it didn't even take you an hour before you were fucking some skank in the back of your limo!" she yelled, tears running freely down her face, her body shaking from the swell of emotions he had provoked within her.

"Don't you dare!" Chuck roared, slamming his palm against the bookcase beside him, the loud strike echoing throughout the room. "How can you even say that? You think that I'm using you but can you even hear yourself? You meant _everything _to me Blair and have you ever considered that I don't just want to fuck you for a night and then never speak of it again?" he growled, taking large strides so that he stood right before her.

His large hands gripped her arms and he had to refrain himself from shaking her until she saw sense. Blair however was speechless - he never raised his voice to her, ever. His grip on her tightened until it became painful, but she needed this - she needed to feel his anger, she needed to feel him.

"Have you ever even contemplated that maybe I want more from you then just sex?" he paused waiting for an answer, but received none. He clenched his jaw and dropped her arms as he backed away towards the door.

"_I _can't be _your _booty call Blair. If you want me, you're going to have to be in it for the long haul." the words were on the tip of his tongue, the three words that he had denied Blair in high school that had ultimately been the root cause of him losing her to that pompous prick she called a husband.

But they couldn't come. This wasn't the right time to say it and he didn't want them to just be tossed around carelessly. He knew how much of a ground breaker those three words were to them.

"I… want to be with you and not just in that way. If you want me? The offer is open, you know where to find me." with a fleeting nod he reached for the handle of the door and tugged it open.

"Chuck, please wait." Blair begged, wiping her teary eyes with the back of her hand, "I don't know what you expect me to do… I mean, I'm married Chuck. Things aren't as simple as they were in high sch-"

"Enough." he held his hand up to silence her. "The offer is there. You just need to decide what it is that you really want. Me or Marcus, because until you decide, I can't be with you." and with that he was gone.

Walked away, leaving her stood in the suddenly cold and dark room with a decision that was going to effect the rest of her life. The question?

What the fuck was she going to do?

XOXO

Serena strolled down the long hallways of Constance reminiscently, her eyes tracing over all the minor details she had never noticed when she attended the school. The complicated designs etched into the solid mahogany banisters, the gleaming chandeliers that hung proudly from the ceiling above - illuminating the ground below.

She smiled to herself as she continued on leisurely, happy to spend this moment to herself - her only companion her memories of the greatest years of her life. Her heels clacked on the floor as she turned the corner, her eyes widening in delight as they fell upon the trophy cabinet that stretched the entire length of the hallway. She followed down the time line until she found the 2007 section.

Her hand reached out to touch the polished glass as she recommitted herself to all of the memories. They were all here, the four of them, the best friends - all for their own individual achievements.

"GIRLS CHAMPIONSHIP HOCKEY TEAM '07 - CAPTAINED BY BLAIR WALDORF AND SERENA VAN DER WOODSEN"_ - _there they were, backs straight, hair blowing gently in the breeze, shirts a polished white and skirts a vibrant blue.

_They all look so young, _she thought fondly.

She moved onto the picture beside it which was of a young Charles Bass with the men's volleyball team. The school had forced Chuck to take up an extra curricular activity after he had been caught for the fourth time smoking hash in the alcove beside the bike sheds. He had to take up volleyball and after a few team talks and persuasions by his friends, he actually attended a training session and found that he was actually very good at it.

Her eyes scanned each photo, some bringing back good memories, some bringing back bad but each of them filling her with a happiness she had missed - she had missed feeling so young.

The breath was knocked out of her body however when she saw one photo in particular. She had almost missed it as it was on the very top shelf, surrounded by strewn medals all donning ex-students names. A wave of memories flooded back and she felt a single tear slip down her cheek as she carefully opened the thick glass cabinet. Her delicate hand reached up to clutch the cool golden photo frame, pushing objects gently out of the way. She closed the door silently, not wanting to signal any attention to herself - enjoying this moment she was having alone.

She traced her fingertip lovingly over the photo of the gentleman, wiping away the small dust particles that had gathered over the years. She fingered his strong arms, the dimple you could just about make out on his cheek, the wide smile that he always wore. Her eyes drifted to the small caption in the left hand corner.

"PROM KING & QUEEN - NATHANIEL ARCHIBALD & SERENA VAN DER WOODSEN"

The night had been flawless. He had pulled off all the stops to make that night the most special, sensual and satisfying night he could possibly create. She remembered everything so clearly…

XOXO

_She stared into the mirror assessing her appearance. She knew she looked good. Her hair was pinned to the side, her freshly curled blonde locks spilling over her left shoulder. She wore a one of a kind Roberto Cavalli dress; a royal emerald green with a tight fitting bodice which flared out from the hip downwards - similar to the one she wore at Cotillion, only differing in colour._

_She heard the doorbell ring and she felt her chest flutter in excitement. He was here. A dazzling smile set over her face and a squeal of excitement left her mouth as she jumped up and down on the spot - clapping her hands enthusiastically. He was here, she was ready and it was time. She floated out of her bedroom and down the corridor hurriedly before coming to a stop at the top of the carpeted staircase. _

_Breath in, breath out… breath in, breath out…_

"_Serena dear? Nathaniel's arrived, come on down sweetheart, don't want to keep him waiting now do we?" she heard her mother sing-song from downstairs, the tone of her voice giving away her evident excitement. _

_As ready as I'll ever be…_

_Deftly, she descended the staircase, her fingertips gripping the banister firmly, almost afraid that she would fall - her head dizzy with excitement. One foot in front of the other was something she had perfected by the age of two and yet now it seemed like one of the most complex tasks of her life._

_She turned the corner and there they were. Her mother, eyes watering at the vision of her radiant daughter. Her father, who had cancelled an important board meeting to witness his daughter attend her only prom; pride palpable in his usually bleak eyes. _

_Then there he was. Her best friend and boyfriend stood there, his crisp tux making him look even more handsome than usual. He looked up at her with his lop-sided grin as he took her in - his eyes devouring every inch of her._

"_Wow. You look… just wow." he breathed, taking a few small steps towards the staircase, his hand outstretched to reach hers._

_XOXO_

_They had spent the past hour exchanging pleasantries with their classmates, mingling and conversing with teachers but now, finally, they were alone. They swayed gently to the music, gazing into eat others eyes as Nada Surf played in the background. His arms were wrapped loosely around her waist and her arms were draped around his neck - their bodies pressed firmly together._

"_Thank you." Serena whispered into the crook of his neck, her fingers absentmindedly stroking his soft nape hairs. She felt him smile against her cheek,_

"_For what?"_

"_Tonight." she pulled back to lock eyes with him, "Tonight was perfect. I'll remember it forever… especially this moment." he nodded before he pressed a slow, deliberate kiss to her lips - savouring the taste of her._

"_You know, I'm gunna marry you some day." he mumbled, his arms wrapping tighter around her frame. She only grinned, a bubbly laugh escaping her lips._

"_Well, when you do?" she pressed her lips against his ear as if she were divulging a secret only he could know, "I'll say yes."_

XOXO

She laughed lightly as she wiped the tears away from her eyes. How differently had things turned out? Not only had she not even seen Nate in years, she was trotting all around the world with her fiancé who happened to be a man whom Nate had despised in high school - a man she had never expected to socialise with, let alone marry!

"Don't be ashamed to cry, I'll admit, that particular photo has had me shed a few tears over the years too." she jumped at the voice that came from behind her. She turned slowly and let out a breath of air she hadn't realized she'd been holding when she saw Nate leaning casually against the opposite wall, his signature grin in check.

She heard her own breath hitch but she disguised it with a grin to match his before she rushed forward and enwrapped him in her arms wordlessly. The moment their bodies touched a colossal sense of nostalgia washed over her.

His body was so familiar. By a simple hug, she could feel the memories flooding through her. The nights spent sat in his arms watching the stars, running riot through the streets in drunken states laughing at everything and anything, just having young, juvenile fun; there was never a dull moment when they were together.

"Nate, it's been too long." he nodded, the moment filling her with déjà vu from the night they spent together at prom.

"Too long." he agreed, pulling away to study her unabashedly. He smirked in open appreciation.

"Looking good S, don't look a day over forty." she smacked him gently on the arm, an unladylike snort escaping her.

"How gentlemanly of you to say that. You always were a charmer." she smiled, eyeing down the empty corridor that led towards the grand hall which had been decorated for the occasion to serve the purpose of a dance floor.

"Shall we walk?" he asked, following her gaze - she nodded, sliding her arm loosely through his' mutely asking him to escort her. They ambled along, a comfortable silence exchanged between them; a silence which Nate soon broke.

"So who's the lucky guy?" he prodded, smiling down at her warmly. She frowned, confused as to how he knew; she had only told Blair after all. He chuckled as he appeared to read her mind.

"I couldn't help but notice the ring you're wearing, it's not exactly the smallest of diamonds now is it?" he winked, once again earning a small laugh.

"Well, if you must know," they turned the corner sharply, the elegant hall coming into view, "I'm soon going to be Mrs Carter Baizen." she looked up to face him sheepishly, not sure as to how he would react. He pondered the thought for a minute before he simply acquiesced - taking her hand softly and spinning her around, through the looming door and into the crowd of ex-students who were dancing along to the music flooding the hall.

They fell into an easy rhythm - they had danced together multiple times over the years after all and sometimes it appeared as though they knew each other better than they knew themselves.

"Tell him congratulations from me," Serena rose a perfectly plucked eyebrow, a small smile on her lips,

"I mean that!" he added, laughing. The song changed to a more upbeat song to which Serena began to dance to, her hips gyrating back and forth to the beat. Nate's head bobbed to the beat, his body shuffling closer to Serena's, their bodies losing themselves in the beat.

"So, anyone in your love life?" Serena yelled over the suddenly loud music, Nate shrugged.

"I'm with Bree Buckley but… it's very complicated - I do love her though." she nodded in understanding. She knew that Nate didn't throw that world around lightly; she had been the only girl previously that he has said those words to and both of them had been convinced that they were forever.

That however, was when the mood drastically changed. The upbeat song died out and a new song began - the first few notes like a punch of memories to the face. Their eyes connected as they both remembered the symbolism of this song - their prom song.

"_Emergency above_

_Put on your hard hats and invisible gloves_

_What's going on?_

_I was on the wagon, I thought I was done_

_You'll have to watch out_

_When one falls in, another can't get out"_

Her eyes filled with tears as the familiar notes sent shivers up her spine to the point where she felt she couldn't breath. Being here with him, dancing to this song, in this very room - it was like nothing had changed… but it had. This truly was a reunion she hadn't even considered would happen but in that moment, she couldn't care less. She loved Carter, that she knew, but what harm could one last dance do?

"_You say, and I like what you say_

_I like what you say_

_You say, and I like what you say_

_I like what you say"_

Her hand instinctively rose to touch Nate's cheek, tilting his head so that he would look her in the eye. When she met his eyes she could see the emotion swirling in their depths. Her hand slipped down his jaw to rest on his chest, feeling his heartbeat hammer away inside him.

"_They say you have to have somebody_

_They say you have to be someone's_

_They say if you're not lonely alone_

_Well there is something wrong_

_And you say"_

"Serena there are so many things I never got to say to you after we broke up." Nate mumbled, his voice wavering. She repressed the tears aching to spill, only waited for him to continue when he was ready.

"Tell me. I'm here." she whispered, the voice almost inaudible. He pressed his lips together, his eyes welling up.

"I'm so sorry for acting the way I did when you told me you were leaving. There is not a day that goes by when I wonder what would have happened to us if that entire mess had never happened…" he paused, swallowing to prevent his voice from cracking from the emotion.

She knew what he was trying to say.

"_And I like what you say_

_I like what you say_

_You say, and I like what you say_

_I like what you say_

_You say, baby_

_I only wanna make you happy_

_Baby, I only wanna make you…"_

"You'll always be my first love Nate and I'll always love you." she finished for him, a stray tear forming in the corner of her eye at the beauty of the moment.

"You were my first love and I'll never forget you or any of the times we've shared, you'll always be special to me. Your happiness means everything to me." he smiled warmly at her words, curling one of her long strands of hair in around his finger.

"I will always love you too." he lent forward and pressed a reverent kiss to her damp cheek, before he pulled away; the song ending moments later.

"Goodbye Nate." Serena whispered, her fingers brushing the place where his lips had previously been. He smiled, backing away into the once again dim lit corridor.

"Goodbye S." and there he left her, in the middle of the crowded dance floor; the angel who finally felt she had a sense of closure that she deserved.

XOXO

Blair dashed out of the headmasters office, her eyes scanning the isolated hallway to ensure that it was truly isolated. When she was certain enough that it was and that she looked as presentable as possible she began to make her way towards the main entrance; hoping to find the Duke.

So that he could take her back to her loveless marriage and act like this night never even happened. To hell with it, maybe she'd even put the past in the past with the Duke and just let him touch her. It had been months after all.

The idea alone made her feel sick to her stomach but she was quickly running out of options. Look how easily she had just handed herself to Chuck! If their was one thing she knew, it was that a man had to work his ass off to be within her wavelength - let alone touch her so simply if she were not committed to him.

She shuddered at the thought of what her mother would be saying if she could see her now, lipstick stains, dress rumpled and small traces of mascara she'd missed still donning her cheeks.

Disappointed - that's what she'd be. Disappointed in the temptress she was ashamed to call a daughter.

Her heels clacked loudly over the freshly polished tiles as she hurried to find the Duke, worried that she would change her mind if she didn't find him soon. She couldn't believe she was even considering any of what Chuck had said.

Why would she even _think _to commit herself to Chuck again when he had let her down so many times in the past? He said he was in it for the long haul but those were not the words she needed to hear from him and until she heard those three words, eight letters - she would not be satisfied with his efforts.

Plus there was the small glitch that she was in fact, a married woman with a title and a duty she had to respect and live up to. She owed it to Marcus, despite all of his misdeeds, to make good on her oath and take care of her responsibilities.

If there was one thing she had learnt by this catastrophe of a night, it was that no matter how much she wanted to be; she just wasn't in high school anymore. Those days were long gone and as painful as it was to say goodbye, she knew she had to.

She had given up her happiness long ago for power and she had given up the only man she had truly loved for security. Was it the right choice? She still didn't know.

When she finally reached the main entrance, she studied the area hoping to find Marcus but to no avail. Taking a deep breath to steady her nerves she headed off towards the bar area. Smiling politely at those she passed, she fought hard to keep her tactfully placed smile in position.

The line of people waiting to talk to her was unbearable and she soon found herself lost in the throng of eager faces all enthusiastic to hear about how she and the Duke had "fallen so in love" or how she "had found the perfect husband". she felt sick to her stomach as she heard the lies tumble out of her mouth.

She hardly recognized the sound of her own voice. She had to get away from this.

Excusing herself as politely as she could, she scurried away from the familiar faces of her friends, (some unchanged, others hardly recognizable) and through the closest door.

She found herself in the hall. She studied the scene before her appreciatively, admiring the tasteful décor. Her eyes scanned the faces on the dance floor briefly to see if she could spot the Duke but once again she couldn't.

_Where on earth was he?_

She was about to leave to attempt to find the bar once again in hope that she'd find him when she spotted something that made her stop dead in her tracks. In the corner of the room, beside the other exit were Serena and Nate. She watched them carefully, the knot in her stomach that seemed to always be pulled tight beginning to loosen as she saw the way they looked into each others eyes.

The look they shared between them was a look that she had only even seen herself once before. It was a look of a promise, a promise that they would love one another forever. It didn't matter if they did not love each other equally, or if they were not necessarily _in _love with one another.

No, it was a silent promise passed between them that just showed that they always cared, would always be there and would never forget the memories they'd shared.

That simple, fleeting look that had passed between them was one of closure, of a final goodbye; and it broke her heart to see it end. She had always thought that Serena and Nate were forever, and honestly, if life hadn't taken such a masochistic pleasure in throwing some badly timed obstacles in their way, she still believed that they would still be together now. However, when those obstacles appeared, they seemed to fall apart, to self destruct with one another, so now they had found other people to fill the void that they had left in each others hearts. They had given up, but somehow, had been fortunate enough to find their soul mates amid the chaos.

Was that what had happened with her and Chuck? Had they given up on something special but not been as fortunate to find someone better?

Yes. She was sure of it now.

She and Chuck couldn't find other people better suited for each other because they were each others soul mates.

She was throwing her soul mate away - she was ruining her last chance at happiness.

Fuck titles and duties - she'd been respecting the demands of others for far too long and for once she was going to ignore her head and go with her heart. She was not going to throw away her great love. He was hers and she was his. Whether he said the words aloud or not - she knew he felt them and that had to be enough for her.

She hurtled out of the hall, ignoring the puzzled glances and stares of bewilderment as she flew across the room and out of the entrance into the cool night. She ignored the warning signals telling her to go back and just forget about it all because for the first time in what felt like forever - she finally had a risk that she deemed worthwhile taking.

Lifting her dress higher to prevent it from dragging along the floor, she scurried down the tall steps and out of the wrought iron gates. There were taxis lined along the curb and she leapt into one without a second thought. Usually she wouldn't be caught dead in a taxi but she didn't care now. She'd made her decision and her body she overflowing with excitement at the thought of it.

Who says she wasn't deserving of happiness? She didn't care, because as long as she was ensconced in the arms of the man who brought her that happiness, the opinions of others did not matter to her in the slightest.

"The Empire, and step on it." she called to the taxi driver, slamming the door shut tight, as she waved goodbye to her past and welcomed her future with open arms.

XOXO

A/N: Tah dah! Hope it didn't get too dull but I felt this was the only place I could leave it. Please review with your ideas and comments, they are what encourage me to continue to write. Thank you so much for your last reviews, they were lovely to read! Hope you liked this chapter! REVIEW. - MC.


	5. Chapter 5

Her eyes scanned the area carefully making sure that no one saw her before she slipped silently through the hidden fire exit at the back of the Empire. Back when they were teens and they had spent those fleeting weeks falling in and out of each others bed they had ensured that it was kept immensely private - even their best friends not falling privy to the tryst.

They had developed various methods and routes to take in order to not be seen entering of exiting each others houses late at night - not wanting to trigger any attention from Gossip Girl or her spies.

Sparing a final glance outside, Blair closed the heavy door behind her, her fingers edging along the wall to find the light-switch which she flicked on upon location. Gathering the front of her dress around her hips she hurried down the corridor briskly and over to the elevator shaft, taping repetitively on the button as her impatience got the better of her.

When she was finally inside she pressed the button for the penthouse suite and typed in the conformation code that she would never and could never forget. The one which would ultimately lead her back to him. Every passing second felt like a lifetime as it kept her from him.

All the years of dissatisfaction; of wishing and dreaming and longing for him to come back to her, for her to have the strength and courage to leave her bore of a husband.

Finally, the doors opened with a faint whoosh and she found herself praying that he was alone, realizing suddenly that he could be with anyone - he may not even be here.

She felt a lump grow in her throat as she stepped into the darkness of the penthouse, the only light, from the moon beaming in through the glass windows. Nostalgia hit her like a ton of bricks as she took in the décor of the room, the familiarity of it making her emotional.

Tears sprang to her eyes and she covered her mouth with her hand to stifle the sob which threatened to escape. Nothing had changed. It was as though she were seventeen again and she had just ditched one of her mothers insufferable fundraisers in favour of a steamy rendezvous with the playboy of the Upper East Side.

She could almost see it now.

Her hair tousled as she bound out of the elevator, a spring of anticipation in her step as she called out the name which felt dangerously good on her tongue. She could picture the door opening and her being met by that devilish smirk that she hated to love and loved to hate.

She'd lean her shoulders against the doorframe arching her back so that her hips were thrust forward, her dress riding up her thighs. His eyes would be one step ahead, already raking her figure like he owned it.

Then she'd feel her breath catch in her throat at the primal gleam in his eyes and he'd step towards her and say -

"Blair?" Blair jumped out of her reverie as Chuck's deep voice echoed throughout the exceedingly silent penthouse. He moved towards her slowly from his position behind the bar, his movements rigid as though he was unsure what move he should make but the shine in his eyes betrayed his restless manner.

"Sorry, I should've told you I was coming, I just-" she paused, trying to find the right words to say, irritated at herself for becoming one of those bumbling idiots that plague the movie screens. He held a hand up to silence her, nodding his head to show her that he knew what she was trying to say.

He looked tired, like he had spent the past hours thinking about his troubles and stressing about the past and future. His tie was loose around his neck and his shirt was unbuttoned to the chest.

He still managed to look completely and utterly fuckable.

Not knowing what to say, Blair simply remained as still as possible, waiting for him to make the first move; he didn't disappoint.

Soon he was stood in front of her, too close for another man to stand in front of a married woman. His hand outstretched and stroked along her cheek gently, the softness in his touch enough to make her heart swell.

"Please," his voice quivered as he felt her tiny hands wind around the lapels of his jacket, "Please stay with me." the agony reflected in his voice made her throat tighten and her chest heave,

"Why do you want me?" Blair choked, burying her face into his strong chest trying to hide herself from him as her insecurities got the better of her.

"I watched you walk out of my life once Blair and I never want to have to go through that pain again." Chuck replied, forcing her to look him in the eye as his hand stroked her hair comfortingly,

"You mean so much to me words can't even begin to describe it." he confessed in one of his rare moments of complete honesty, "But I can't go through this all again. If you want to be with me then I am all in but if you don't know what you want - please don't give me false hope. It'd kill me Blair."

Blair sucked in, the words she so desperately wanted; _needed _to say escaping her at the worst possible time… so she replied in the only other way she could.

She threw herself into his arms, crashing his body roughly against hers as her lips latched onto his; moving so quickly and ferociously it was as though he was her life support. He met her intensity with his own, delving into her mouth with his tongue and groaning at the taste of her all over again.

She was the sweetest torture and the feel of her hands running all over his body and running through his hair made his impatience for her only grow.

There was no way he was going to make it to the bedroom.

He pulled away briefly to shed his jacket letting it crumple to the floor as he then pounced at her, riding her tiny body up against the dividing wall.

Blair's body was going into overdrive and she cursed herself for ever giving this up. The idea of being able to experience this feeling whenever and wherever she wanted made the knot in her stomach tighten in appreciation.

Her nimble hands gripped onto the collar of his shirt and mustering her wanton strength she tore the fabric in half; her eyes rolling back in her head as the buttons sprayed out over the floor.

She managed to tear her lids open to devour the look of his muscular chest heave up and down against her, the tufts of black hair still donning it reminding her of the Chuck Bass in high school.

Her hands reached out to rake her nails across his defined abs, marking it as hers so that if another girl weaselled her way into the billionaire's bed they would know that he was not theirs.

He was hers and she was his and no one could change that.

Without warning, Chuck's hands suddenly stilled around her and the ache in her stomach grew so that it was almost unbearable. Every nerve in her body literally screamed to be taken by him, to have him inside her once again.

"Why'd you stop?" she whined, rubbing her core against his straining erection in a desperate attempt to create the friction she so greatly desired. When his movements did not continue she stroked away the dark strands of hair which had fallen into his eyes.

His eyes were locked on her hand.

She glanced down and noticed she was still wearing the Beaton diamond and she scolded herself for not thinking that through.

"Hey…" she guided his face up to hers and pressed a kiss to his lips so powerful it left her out of breath and dizzy - trying to convey her feelings for him in a single kiss. "I've always been yours, I always will be."

To prove her point to him, she slipped the silver band from her finger and let it fall to the ground, the soft ping causing a smirk to grow on Chuck's face as their lips immediately reconnected.

Not wanting to waste another moment, Blair's hands fumbled with his belt whilst his fingers slid the zip of her dress down speedily and he backed her up until her knees hit the back of the sofa, sending her tumbling onto the soft furnishing.

Clothes flew across the room, the only sounds the breathy moans and groans and the clink of belts and heels flying to the ground as they explored each others body's, their fingers and lips retracing the skin that they knew like the back of their hand.

He knew that she had a sensitive spot just behind her ear.

She knew that he was uncontrollably ticklish on his feet.

He knew that kissing her neck awoke her primal alter ego.

She knew that he loved it when she sucked on his pulse point.

Only they knew these things - they were Chuck and Blair, Blair and Chuck and no matter how many years had passed, that was one thing which would always stay the same.

The heat in the air was electric and both of them were desperate to feel the other, their bodies connecting at every single point possible. When he finally thrust inside her both of them let out a shriek at how good it felt to be inside each other again after all those years of agony.

Of the lonely nights spent wishing that they were together again, curled up under the Empire's sheets both limbs and hearts entwined.

Chuck bit his lip between his teeth trying his absolute hardest to keep his movements slow, wanting the reunion to last as long as possible. Her hands palmed his chest whilst his gripped onto the arm of the sofa for leverage, his muscles rippling with each drive.

That was one of Blair's favourite things about sex with Chuck Bass - it was all visual. The way his muscles flexed and heaved with each thrust; the way his eyes clouded over to near ebony with lust as he watched her; the power which emanated from him as he took complete control over her body and made her feel things she'd never felt worthy enough to feel.

She felt like heaven, tight and hot on his shaft and when she rubbed her naked form against him and sucked on his earlobe stars flashed across his eyes from the feeling.

The knots in their stomachs were unyielding, throbbing and before they could help it the slow pace was history as they pounded against each other unforgiving - giving each other all they could give and all they could take.

"Oh Chuck I- Oh God…" Blair purred in his ear, her sentences jumbling as her breaths came out in sharp, sporadic gasps.

"Fuck," Chuck groaned, his knuckles white from how tight he was gripping the supporting arm, "Yes, Blair… just like that."

His words and sounds of approval egged her on and soon her hips were thrusting up from the sofa in time with his and she was undulating beneath him. This was it, the moment that they became one once again.

They came together which was no surprise as they had always been in sync, the only two able to keep up with the other. It was hard, fierce and ardent and as his seed spilled into her she knew.

She could never go back to Marcus, it wouldn't be fair on either of them as for the first time in a near decade, she felt complete; satisfied and breathless.

She was completely and utterly in love with the person in front of her and had been ever since she was sixteen.

Luckily for her, so was he.

XOXO

"Wow." he breathed rolling off of her exhausted body and lifting the sheet around them, pulling her body flush against his. She blushed at the kind gesture, digging her face into the crook of his neck and gently kissing the taut columns.

After there unification on the sofa they had somehow managed to stagger their way into the bedroom and had spent the last three hours under the sheets opening themselves up to each other once again and recommitting every little detail to their memory.

"Not bad for an old timer." Blair giggled, nudging him in the side. He smiled down at her, the happy grin on her face enough to make his insides flutter.

Slowly and ever so tenderly, Chuck turned onto his side and stroked his hand down her cheek - the look in his eyes making hers tear up. She mirrored his position and waited patiently for him to speak, knowing that he was building courage to say something that was ultimately going to make or break her world.

"I've missed you so much Blair." he whispered as his large hands played with her tiny ones, his eyes avoiding hers as they watched the entwining digits.

"Everyday without you was like a day I wasn't living." she watched with wide eyes as he shuddered, overcome with emotion.

"I want to live again Blair… and I want to live with you. No more excuses," his eyes lifted up to connect with hers and the hunger in his eyes made the happy tears Blair had tried to keep at bay pour down her face.

"Chuck I-"

"No just, just listen - you need to hear this." he took a deep, shaky breath before he continued,

"You have always been it for me Blair, I knew it long before that night at Victrola but after that limo ride I knew that there was no going back. Those weeks with you were the happiest I had ever been and these years that have passed without you - they mean nothing to me.

"You are my world Blair and I promise, I will never make you feel insignificant again. Everyday I will prove to you just how much you mean to me." his thumb stroked along her ring finger wistfully, the slight imprint of the Beaton diamond still visible.

"One day, my ring will be on this finger and you _will _be Mrs Blair Bass."

He smiled at her sleepily, winding his arms around her waist and snuggling into her.

"I love you. I'm sorry it took me so long to tell you what I knew ever since I met you but there it is. I'm Chuck Bass and I love you, Blair Cornelia Waldorf."

"I love you too Charles Bartholomew Bass, more than I ever believed possible."

And as their lips connected they were sure. No matter what problems they faced, no matter how many hearts they broke and no matter how many people doubted them - they were going to be together.

Because when you had a love like theirs, you never gave up. You fought for it because some things were just worth fighting for and even if the past had been rough and there had been more bad times than good; if your love was strong enough it would make it through.

Finally, after years of fear, pain and solitude; they had accepted the past and the future had never looked so good.

XOXO

A/N: Million apologies for how long I took to update this but here it is, the finished piece. I hope you guys enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it and I hope that I managed to create a believable Chuck and Blair as that was my main aim in this story.

Reviews make me smile and thank you to everyone who followed/favourited/reviewed this story it means a lot!

-MC.


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